Further Adventures with Kefir

Elise-

                I’m still making kefir, producing kefir, growing kefir. Whatever.  All I know is that the kefir grains are growing and growing and I have more and more kefir. The dogs are now eating kefir. His Lordship has taken some and enjoyed it. And still the kefir grains continue to grow. I think the person who made that movie, The Blob, was growing kefir. 

                I’m not complaining. OK, I’m complaining a little. But the kefir is good and since I discovered the second fermentation, it is really good.

                For a second fermentation, I strain the kefir the first time to remove the grains. I then put it in a new, clean jar, add some citrus peel or a few berries, something to encourage more fermentation, grapes would probably work. The permeable cover goes back on the jar and it spends another night on the counter. 

   

             That’s it. Twice fermented kefir.

                I use it immediately or put it in the fridge for later. I think it is good for it to have a second day with the permeable cover, let it to adapt to the chilly environs with plenty of air. After that I leave a real lid on it. Once the real lid is on the jar, it needs to breathe every 24 hours. It also needs to exhale, and if not allowed this respite, the jar can explode. I don’t think His Lordship attends to this part. I’ve warned him about the risk of explosion, but he remains cavalier.

              

  Salad dressing or raita;

with berries, dried fruit or nuts; 

in smoothies; kefir is an ingredient that can go from sweet to savory, from breakfast to dinner, from counter to table. Like the perfect pocketbook, it will overcome cheap shoes, like real wicker, it will allow you to say, “It’s real wicker.” In other words, you can gloat.

                And I have too many Kefir grains. If anyone wants a starter kit, I’ll provide grains, a jar and a quart of raw milk. The smugness will come from you.

Peanut Butter Cookies, Squared

Dear Marg,

Too bad Paleo-istas can't eat peanuts.

All my love, Elise

Kefir

Elise,

As you know, I get raw, organic, whole milk every week. It has been marvelous for my allergies, and then there are the other nine months of the year. Cheese is an option, except that paleoistas can’t have cheese. Yogurt is out because I recall some homemade yogurt that was slippery, stringy, mucousy and all around revolting. What to do? What to do!

Kefir!

A person can make their own kefir. Kefir comes from Kefir grains—small, rubbery, irregularly shaped balls, very like bits of rubber cement. I don’t know where kefir grains come from, probably Baby Jesus. Then Amazon is the broker. Mine arrived in the mail in a thin milk-ish medium. 

 

Kefir grains are ALIVE, no time to waste. They go into a glass jar where they get covered with milk, ideally your raw, organic, whole milk. Close the top of the jar with a breathable cover—I use a paper coffee filter—set it on the counter and wait. 

 

The grains are very small to begin, maybe a teaspoon’s worth all together. I used a pint jar and added a cup of milk. I changed the milk every two days, straining the grains out using a nylon strainer and putting them in a fresh, clean jar. Apparently it is very important that the jar is clean and the strainer is nylon

. After about two weeks, the grains looked a little more robust and I strained the kefir into a bowl and had it with berries.

 

Luckily I was a few months into Paleo at this point, because this kefir is SOUR. More sour than plain yogurt, one of those things that taste good just because you know how HEALTHY it is. Maybe I’ll bring some on our next vacation. We can have it with the prunes.

After a month, the grains have tripled in size, and from then on, the kefir is thick-ish. I moved from a 4 inch strainer to a 7 inch strainer.

They grow up so fast!

The grains continue to grow and soon I am adding 2 cups of milk and I have kefir in just two days. Voila!

I mostly use it in smoothies and for this, it is marvelous.

I am not completely conversant in the life and times of a kefir grain, but as I understand it, they eat the milk. Does this mean kefir is a waste product? If you leave town, you can add extra milk and refrigerate the grains  for up to two weeks. I’m not sure what happens if you leave them for longer. I’m not sure I can ask my house sitter to tend the kefir grains. Six dogs with a DSM-V‘s worth of emotional issues is one thing; kefir, clean jars and nylon strainers seems like a task too far. 

A Better Bean

Dear Marg,

I went to a meeting earlier this week and all my friends were raving about this company that is creating not just a new product but a whole new class of food. Beans, like canned, but fresh, in the refrigerated section with the fresh salsa and hummus.Apparently it is very difficult to get consumers to stretch their preconceived notions of where and how beans ought to be bought.

I bought some and you know what, they are great. As you expand your Paleo horizons-o I'd highly recommend A Better Bean.They'd be good in a breakfast burrito. But not a smoothie, even a weekday smoothie.

Love,

Elise

Party Pour Une

Amos is at hockey. Gardening is done for the day. All is well.

Just Deserts, No Dessert

Dear Alison, Abigail and Mom,

As you know, Margaret and His Lordship, Amos and I all went to Moab for a week. What you may not realize is that going on vacation with Margaret is egs-aust-ing. Biking, hiking, canyoneering, all before noon. Granted it was so ungodly hot that you had to be done with your outdoor activities by then but still. First there's her generally high level of enthusiasm and energy, and then you add a few cups of Peet's and you've got yourself a doozy of a day planned.

Speaking of which, here's what happens every night around 9.

Marg: so, what are we going to do tomorrow?
HL: uh oh,  she's on the planning barge.
Marg: no I'm not, I just want to know what time we are getting going in the morning.
HL: Planning barge.
Marg: It's late and I want to go to bed and I need to know what time to get up.
All: okaaaay


The sum of all this activity was afternoons spent in bleary comas, books askew on gently rising and falling chests, the comforting hum of the anemic air conditioner in the background. We'd rally around 6 or 7 for Paleo Dinner. No dessert. Occasionally we'd have a few prunes.
 

Amos

Dear Margaret,

At the end of his trek Amos had Chicken Parmesan in an Italian restaurant in Kathmandu. He described it as the best chicken he'd ever had in his life, which may have had something to do the trek and its diet of potatoes, cabbage and lentils.  Nonetheless, yesterday he set out to recreate it. He looked up recipes on line, read the one from Martha Stewart and never looked back. He also never looked at the recipe again. He made a shopping list, bought his ingredients and set to work. I stayed out of it, and out of the kitchen.

Sauteed garlic in olive oil, added a can of tomatoes and a selection of the contents of the spice drawer and reduced. Pounded the chicken breasts with a hammer from the basement, coated them in panko and sauteed them up.

This is where it began to go south. He had forgotten to put the parmiesan in with the panko, and forgotten that Martha had some advice about coating the chicken with egg before coating it with the panko.So he very cleverly made a bed of panko and parmesian in the bottom of the pan, thinking this would take care of it. Unfortunately, it burned in place.

But, you know what? We scraped the burned panko off and it was delicious. Next time - coating the chicken with milk, mixing the parm with the panko, and more oil for the frying part. and then, Kathmandu, watch out!